if i could (again)

unedited writings from someone inside, their way of speaking and telling and communicating
–the ones inside who speak and write like this often do not use any punctuation, so it is missing
–an edited version will be added later

if i could
i would tell it again
if only to show
you can do it

again

again

the night draws near
hanging with it
the lights of night
crosses under
the land of fright

don’t worry
i won’t tell
a soul
for the soul i bear
is dead once more

don’t take me away
for i’ve gone away
on my own
but you know that,
now that you own
me

oh that flattened me
for you know it is a
we
of a family
oh that we are
inside
and out
but shame the inside
and flood the out
with smiles and masks
for we are all in this
together

we dance left right left
and sing chants for
natas

and the silence
begets silence
for the silence
stops the silent
fingers telling
and never oh never
shall the silence
whisper a sound
but silence
and nothing oh nothing
will be told
past natas

you know me by “if i could”