I’ve come here several times to write the last 2 days or so, but I can’t seem to write anything. I know there is much to write about– it’s just that it seems stuck inside right now. I’m tired and worn out emotionally. We’re hanging on, but things just seem to be out of whack. I’m also experiencing a ton of hypervigilance at home–keep hearing sounds that someone is coming into my apartment via the door or sliding glass door or window. I experience panic and body freeze while trying to decipher the sounds and where they are coming from, while also trying to filter out the fear and determine whether there is real danger or not. The sounds seem to be noticed whenever I’m trying to sleep or asleep (and wake up), irregardless whether it is daytime or nighttime. It just seems like all of this is heightened and more intense and stressful lately.
There’s more but it is stuck inside for now.
Julie
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